Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones (2002)

 ☆ ☆ ☆

Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones (2002) – G. Lucas

I am pretty sure I fell asleep when watching this a couple of decades ago but there was no chance of that this time, as the kids howled and booed whenever a romantic scene (between Natalie Portman’s Senator Amidala and Hayden Christensen’s Anakin Skywalker) came on. In truth, these did slow the movie down. Aside from this, I still found it difficult to get my mind around the unfolding transition between the Republic, with the Jedi as its police force, and the evil Empire, now composed of the Trade Federation and a growing number of Separatist planets – led by Christopher Lee’s Count Dooku (really a stand-in for Darth Sidious who I think we can agree is also Chancellor Palpatine and later the Emperor). We were stunned when Jar Jar Binks entered a motion to allow the Chancellor to have unprecedented authoritarian powers – what a moron!  As for the Jedi, Ewan McGregor tries his best as Obi-Wan (left to keep the action going in scenes that alternate with the romance plot), Samuel L. Jackson still has nothing to do as Windu – or at least nothing that capitalises on his usual bad-ass charms, and Yoda is left to get the audience back on board (would have loved to hear a Christopher Lee commentary on that final battle – surely he was bemused to see this turn in his career). Now who ordered the army of clones and whether Yoda commandeered them for the big battle remain obscure for us. Not sure what to make of his suggestion that the Clone Wars have begun (did we need to do some background reading?). Boba Fett’s origin story is pretty confusing too.  At any rate, we are expecting that all will be resolved in Episode III, which has to be better than this, right?

The Great Train Robbery (1978)

 ☆ ☆ ½

The Great Train Robbery (1978) – M. Crichton

I had never heard of this Sean Connery-Donald Sutherland vehicle directed by Michael Crichton from his novel (and also starring Lesley Anne Down). And now I know why – it is deadly dull. It’s hard to say what went wrong – it must have looked great on paper. Crichton had already directed Westworld (1973) and Coma (also 1978), which were hits. Connery was done with Bond and making some odd films (Zardoz!) but still a big star. Sutherland was already very esteemed after MASH (in a number of foreign films and in the concurrent Invasion of the Body Snatchers remake). But despite the high production values (the film takes place in London in 1855) and a plot with numerous twists, as Connery (already a gentleman but also a thief) strategizes how to rob a moving train containing gold destined for Crimea (or perhaps coming from there), the film just doesn’t feel exciting. Even Connery doing his own stunts – walking on top of the train and ducking when it went under bridges – doesn’t add any zing. I’m sure this is only one of the many expected blockbusters cast by the wayside along the road to fame and fortune – I hope I don’t run into too many more.

 

Star Wars: Episode I -- The Phantom Menace (1999)

 ☆ ☆ ☆

Star Wars: Episode I -- The Phantom Menace (1999) – G. Lucas

I saw this (and dismissed it) twenty years ago but Amon (aged 9) was ready to check it out (after already watching eps 4 through 9).  We are deposited very quickly into a seemingly complicated dispute between the Trade Federation (run by some lizards) and the Planet Naboo (led by Queen Amidala/Natalie Portman). Two Jedi Knights (Liam Neeson as Qui-Gon Jinn and Ewan McGregor as Obi-Wan Kenobi) are dispatched to Naboo to stop what turns out to be a plot by the Federation (in conjunction with The Sith) to take over the planet, including its underwater minority group, the Gungans. In order to escape and regroup, the jedis take the Queen and a random accident-prone Gungan (Jar Jar Binks) to Tatooine where they meet slave kid, Annakin Skywalker, who wins a pod race to earn money to get them parts to fly their ship back to uh, I forgot, back to Naboo where they have to make a last stand against the Sith (and their main fighter, Darth Maul, who we were calling Darth Small last night) and an army of robots.  Annakin is strong with the force but Yoda and Samuel L. Jackson (a jedi master, so not just good at foot massage) are worried about what they sense is the possibility of the dark side in him (no duh). In the midst of this confusing plot, there is some razzle dazzle, a lot of CGI creatures, and some obvious and not-so-obvious foreshadowing.  But really, not much suspense because we know who can die and who cannot.  Liam Neeson is rather boring. I hope we don’t have to watch Episode 2 now because I fell asleep the last time.

 

Castle of Blood (1964)

 ☆ ☆ ☆ ½

Castle of Blood (1964) – A. Margheriti

As Mondo Digital suggests, this film may only be 10% plot as compared to 90% atmosphere – but the gothic atmosphere is well worth the price of admission. Alan Foster (Georges Riviere) accepts a wager to spend a night in a haunted castle on All Souls Eve, when the spirits of the dead are due to return and none who accepted the wager in the past escaped the castle’s evil spell.  I was genuinely creeped out when he got dropped off in front of the dark decrepit place, entered the gate, found an old torch, and opened the old wooden door. I wouldn’t want to be him!  Inside, things were just as spooky – shadows reflected in old mirrors, cobwebs on everything, paintings that seem ready to come alive. And then suddenly, Barbara Steele shows up, claiming to have been living in the castle all these years and putting the moves on Foster in a way he can’t (or doesn’t want to) resist.  Of course, it comes as no surprise that she’s no longer living – and we meet a number of other similarly dead residents of the castle who show Foster glimpses of how they met their fate.  Obviously, we know it will soon be his turn…  Beautifully shot in B&W and on par with the Hammer or Bava entries in the horror canon of this period. Check it out if this is your genre.

 

The Big Easy (1986)

 ☆ ☆ ☆ ½

The Big Easy (1986) – J. McBride

I think it was Roger Ebert who said that he’d seen so many thrillers that he just didn’t care about the plots anymore – and it’s true that the (ludicrous) plot of The Big Easy does seem quite beside the point in terms of enjoyment of the film. Instead, its pleasures are found in the New Orleans locale and the sexual tension between Ellen Barkin’s district attorney’s office investigator and police detective Dennis Quaid (showboating with a broad and sometimes incomprehensible Nawlins accent). There may or may not be a gang war and the force may or may not be corrupt (including Quaid’s Remy McSwain) but it is definitely true that both McSwain and Barkin’s Anne Osborne are not really keeping their minds on their work.  Sure, his colleagues, including John Goodman and Ned Beatty, tease him about this but we come to believe that McSwain may be sincere in his feelings. In between the crime scenes, we get some New Orleans music (including Beausoleil, The Neville Brothers, Buckwheat Zydeco, and Professor Longhair), restaurants (Tipitina’s), and locales (not much French Quarter, really). Better than I expected.

Farewell, My Lovely (1975)

 ☆ ☆ ☆

Farewell, My Lovely (1975) – D. Richards

This third version of Chandler’s 1940 novel stars Robert Mitchum as Philip Marlowe, private detective, hired by Moose Malloy to find his lost love, Velma, who stopped keeping in touch while he spent 6 years in the can.  Although the Marlowe of the book is in his 30s, Mitchum was 59 and plays the character as world-weary – which is quite a contrast to the 1944 version starring Dick Powell (called Murder, My Sweet to avoid audiences thinking it was a musical, Powell’s original forté) where Marlowe is portrayed as a bit more full of zing, although still sardonic and cynical about human nature. I’ve practically memorised the 1944 noir, so I started to note the changes in this later version – until there were a bit too many (Florian’s is an African American establishment now, Amthor is a madame in a house of ill-repute, etc.). Later, I checked the book to confirm that although some of the changes made the ’75 film truer to Chandler, the majority did not and the ’44 film remains a more faithful rendition.  The plot is, as usual, complicated – Marlowe gets tricked into chasing the wrong Velma, kidnapped and held prisoner (all drugged up), and pursued by the law for murders that he did not commit. Young Charlotte Rampling has a brief turn as Velma. All told, this is a rather ordinary outing that feels like a made-for-TV movie with that awkward 70s doing the 30s falseness that rings hollow throughout (despite the presence of a genuine film noir star in the lead). Probably OK if you haven’t seen the superior 1944 film.    

 

The Hit (1984)

 ☆ ☆ ☆ ½

The Hit (1984) – S. Frears

Stephen Frears’ first film of the ‘80s is a stylish “noir” shot beautifully in broad daylight in Spain where two hitmen, John Hurt and Tim Roth, finally catch up with Terrence Stamp who ratted out his bank robbing colleagues 10 years before. It’s also a road movie as we follow these three (plus hostage Laura del Sol) as they trek toward France where the gang leader, previously betrayed, awaits. (Deliciously, they are trailed by the cops led by Fernando Rey, of all people). Finally, it’s a mediation on death: Stamp declares that he is ready for it (reading a sonnet by John Donne to prove it) but others do not believe him. I guess it is a sort of existential threat to a hitman’s sense of meaning if death is not feared and John Hurt does seem to gradually lose his bearings across the film. Frears to his credit manages to keep the tension high even though the vibe is often “family vacation”. This is also essentially Roth’s debut (with blond hair) and you can see why Tarantino (a fan of this film) chose him for subsequent projects. Definitely worth a look.