Death on the Nile (1978)

 ☆ ☆ ☆

Death on the Nile (1978) – J. Guillerman

I watched the first of the Kenneth Branagh Agatha Christie adaptations and that was enough for me (tell me if I am wrong).  But taking a sickie today, I decided to watch an older Christie adaptation starring Peter Ustinov as Hercule Poirot, with the late ‘70s version of an all-star cast (David Niven, Bette Davis, Mia Farrow, Angela Lansbury, George Kennedy, Maggie Smith, Olivia Hussey, Jack Warden, Jon Finch, Jane Birkin). Whether I had seen this back in the day (on TV surely) doesn’t quite matter since I couldn’t remember the plot.  As always, everyone has a motive to kill Linnet Ridgeway (Lois Chiles) and, by the end, Poirot will gather all of them (well the survivors anyway) into one room to announce the actual killer.  This time, the suspects are all on a cruise down the Nile after beginning the film at the Sphinx and the Pyramids (seemingly shot on location).  As directed by John Guillerman, it is by-the-numbers murder mystery fare – and that’s all you need on a sick day.

 

Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023)

 ☆ ☆ ☆

Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023) – J. F. Daley & J. Goldstein

I played D&D with friends in the early ‘80s and then encouraged my kids to play (with me as Dungeon Master) over the last few years, though never quite fanatically in either era. So, although we approached the film with trepidation (as one must when you smell that “new franchise” smell), we were also curious.  As it turns out, the film is not bad – a fun fantasy epic full of references to the game (is that a “gelatinous cube”?) and with a plot that contains enough drama (emotional and physical) to hold one’s attention.  But it doesn’t really attain full lift-off and this could be because: 1) we’ve lost patience with the full CGI treatment, wondering openly whether all backdrops were really greenscreens; 2) I personally have had it with the wisecracking hero, played this time by Chris Pine; 3) at 129 minutes, the film feels bloated and, at times, indulgent.  These drawbacks are compensated by many enjoyable moments (such as fighting the fat CGI dragon, wicked Hugh Grant, the bit with the bird man, the hither-thither magic portal, and more).  So, things do balance out, more or less.  I understand that this was not a box-office success, so perhaps that’s it for the franchise.

 

November (2017)

 ☆ ☆ ☆ ½

November (2017) – R. Sarnet

In search of folk horror (an eerie subgenre focused on the supernatural and pagan beliefs/rituals), I stumbled across this Estonian concoction.  Lensed in beautiful rich black & white by Mart Taniel, the film has the look and feel of a Béla Tarr production (although not nearly so slow). In other words, we are in Eastern Europe in the 18^th century, dealing with many peasants (well cast for their seedy looks), who believe in magic, witchcraft, dealings with the Devil and the like – which all turns out to be true, treated as matter-of-fact.  Indeed, the film opens with shots of a “kratt” which appears to be a bunch of inanimate tools that are somehow animated, serving as a slave for a local farmer.  That farmer is the father of the main character, Liina (Rea Lest), who has fallen in love with Hans (Jörgen Liik) who in turn has fallen for the daughter of the local Baron (held in contempt by most locals due to his German origins). Although you could argue that Liina’s pursuit of Hans is the central thread of the plot, the film meanders casually through all sorts of rituals and folk horror episodes – overall, it has the flavour of a fairy tale (romantic and mysterious).  Worth a look just for the visual presentation alone but also if you want to dream along with the story.  Directed by Rainer Sarnet whose latest film seems to be an Estonian Heavy Metal Kung Fu Comedy.

 

Cocaine Bear (2023)

 ☆ ☆ ½

Cocaine Bear (2023) – E. Banks

Well, the title says it all.  More comedy than horror – although there is plenty of gross-out gore – based on the ridiculous effects of the title drug on the (CGI) animal that eats it (after it is dropped from a plane in a smuggling operation gone wrong).  This was Ray Liotta’s last film and he doesn’t actually make a fool of himself, he’s the head drug dealer played straight (so to speak), not for laughs.  Director Elizabeth Banks (an actress in her own right but not in this film) keeps things moving briskly, as the drug dealers seek to find the missing drugs in a national park (“Blood Mountain”) in Georgia USA, and the plot holds together pretty well across the 90 minutes (unlike other “exploitation” films).  I suppose we might draw some parallels between mom Keri Russell searching for her lost daughter and the protective mother bear looking after her cubs, but it would be a stretch to search this movie for themes.  That said, the man vs. nature plot line (with nature out of control) might allude to the world’s climate emergency and our inability to cope with it but then we’ve really gone too far. Much like the bear in this film.  

 

Beau is Afraid (2023)

 ☆ ☆ ☆

Beau is Afraid (2023) – A. Aster

After the excitement that accompanied director Ari Aster’s first two features (Hereditary, 2018, and Midsommar, 2019), Beau is Afraid is something of an inevitable letdown. The excess that marked those earlier efforts in the horror genre seems misjudged here, asking fans to come along for a long (3-hour) idiosyncratic journey that is so determined to defy expectations that it often doesn’t make sense. Or more specifically, it accepts nonsensical events as reality and moves on, which is intriguing if not exactly coherent. That said, I suspect if you watched this very closely and took notes about things going on in the background or present in the (busy) set-design, you just might understand the film better.  I think there is a very likely possibility that the events we see are either a paranoid fantasy or a trip through the protagonist’s unconscious.  That protagonist, Beau (played by Joaquin Phoenix, who is in every scene), is a passive figure, full of neuroses, who is presented as the end-result of the stereotypical guilt-inducing Jewish mother.  In that respect, the film plays like one long anxiety dream presented as a bad joke, things are so insanely awful that this can only be comedy. But how and whether all the anecdotal bits and pieces fit together is a matter for Ari Aster scholars of the future, because the average cinemagoer probably won’t be bothered. (This is not to say that there aren’t moments of supreme creativity and talent here, there are). I’m holding out for his comeback film now.