The Hidden (1987)

 ☆ ☆ ☆

The Hidden (1987) – J. Shoulder

I’d be very surprised if Kyle MacLachlan wasn’t thinking about this film when he played the role of “Dougie” for David Lynch in the final series of Twin Peaks. His role as an FBI agent in The Hidden seems similar in outlook: simple-minded but purposive and relatively affectless. The difference is that Agent Lloyd Gallagher has a secret that he knows better than to share with others, including the Los Angeles cop (Michael Nouri) that he teams up with to track down a whacked-out killer on the loose.  Or more than one killer.  So, it is your typical ‘80s buddy film decked out with car chases and a high body count and at least one visit to a strip joint. But despite all of the clichés, this film gains some points just for its sheer weirdness (there is a sci-fi angle) and, I guess, for the fact that it manages to hold its plot together all the way through.  

 

X (2022)

 ☆ ☆ ☆

X (2022) – T. West

Perhaps the only thing I distinctly remember (aside from the ubiquitous hockey mask) from Friday the 13^th Part III (in 3D! 1982) is an eyeball being torn from a head and thrust out of the screen and into the audience (and yes, I saw this in the theatre for maximum shocks and social support). There is something of an homage to that scene (or to Fulci’s The Beyond) in Ti West’s new film, X. Indeed, in re-watching the trailer to the 3D film now, it is even more apparent how much West’s film is a return to those carefree days of the slasher film. As in the old trailer, a bunch of young people jump into an old van (the new film takes place in 1979), headed to the countryside, where they run into trouble.  In this case, they are actually on their way to make an amateur porno movie – but West turns the old cliché that the characters who have sex are the first to die on its head here (we can talk about the pornification of everything some other time). And, of course, all of the characters do die – save one, but what did you expect? Intriguingly, the killer here is not your ordinary insane man but instead an elderly woman (played in a dual role by Mia Goth who also plays one of the kids in trouble). Part of the horror then is undoubtedly supposed to be based on our repulsion to thinking about old people and, in particular, old people with real human desires.  Perhaps the youthful audience that is more likely to watch this kind of film might find them gross, but West does seem to find some sympathy for the killer(s). Not really what you’d expect in your garden variety slasher film.

 

The Kiss of the Vampire (1963)

 ☆ ☆ ☆ ½

The Kiss of the Vampire (1963) – D. Sharp

Although the plot is standard fare (stranded travellers find themselves invited to vampire castle), there is something different about this Hammer Horror outing, something that makes it feel more unseemly than usual, perhaps more genuinely horrific. I don’t think we can chalk that up to the absence of Christopher Lee or Peter Cushing, although perhaps their charismatic presences make evil and the fighting of it something less than mundane. In this film, with no real recognisable actors (not even Hammer regulars), perhaps there’s a sense that the unspeakable could happen to anyone. The innkeeper’s wife has some deeply sad moments, grieving privately for her daughter, now a vampire as part of the cult lead by Dr Ravna (Noel Willman), grief that is perceived quizzically by our protagonists, Gerald and Marianne (Edward de Souza and Jennifer Daniel), who seem very sheltered if not occasionally buffoonish.  Although warned to be careful by Professor Zimmer (a rather spooky figure himself, played by Clifford Evans), they still attend the fancy dress party held by Ravna where his followers drug Gerald’s drink and then escort Marianne to receive the titular kiss from Ravna. When Gerald awakes, everyone (including the innkeeper) claims never to have seen Marianne.  Fortunately, Zimmer is ready, armed with some supernatural incantations that cause a horde of bats to descend on the vampire clan and destroy them. Even the rubber bats can’t really destroy the unsettling spell cast by this film.